Supporting a loved one with HG
Hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) not only poses challenges for the sufferer it also impacts their loved ones extending far beyond and affecting their entire support network. We understand that witnessing a loved one endure such suffering, particularly during what should be a joyful time, can be incredibly difficult.
This website offers a wealth of resources tailored to assist both you and your loved ones throughout the experience of NVP or HG. Take the opportunity to explore the resources available for sufferers as often as you need. Remember, if you find it challenging to support your partner or another loved one dealing with HG, don't hesitate to reach out to us for assistance.
Be their biggest advocate
Partners play a pivotal role as advocates for HG sufferers within the healthcare system. They offer crucial firsthand insights into symptoms and experiences, ensuring accurate diagnosis and treatment. Additionally, partners provide invaluable support by liaising with healthcare providers, conveying pertinent information, and advocating for the best possible care and understanding for their loved ones.
Understanding the firsthand experience of living with HG can be challenging for partners and caregivers. Despite sharing the same space and witnessing the debilitating effects of symptoms, it's difficult to convey the relentless nausea, frequent vomiting, dehydration, malnutrition, and overwhelming fatigue. Moreover, there's the mental toll of grappling with feelings of guilt, shame, anxiety, depression, isolation, loneliness, and fear.
During periods of incapacitation caused by HG, sufferers rely heavily on their partners to shoulder various responsibilities, including household chores, childcare duties, and potentially even financial burdens if employment is affected. Partners may also find themselves advocating for the sufferer with healthcare providers, offering essential firsthand accounts of symptoms and experiences that are crucial for accurate medical assessment and treatment planning.
Additionally, partners often face the task of educating themselves, extended family members, friends, and healthcare professionals about the condition and available treatment options.
Family & Friends
Watching a loved one suffer from nausea and vomiting in pregnancy or hyperemesis gravidarum can be really tough and it can be harder still to know how best to help and support them. Here are some tips and advice from those who have been through it about what helped them.
-
Keep in touch
Text regularly to let them know you are thinking of them but don't be upset if they don’t return texts or phone calls straight away; it can be really hard to look at screens or talk on the phone while unwell
-
Be mindful
Avoid excessive enthusiasm or excitement about the baby and pregnancy, as they may be experiencing feelings of resentment, anxiety or depression. Overly expressing excitement may further isolate them or pressure them to put on a facade
-
Trust them
Try not to question them about the safety of medications they are on; if a doctor has prescribed them then it is because they are required. If you have concerns then have a look at our Diagnosis & Treatment resource
-
Just listen
Try to listen without giving advice, or telling them about other peoples’ pregnancies or the person you know who was sick but still went to work. Remember, pregnancy sickness has a whole spectrum of severity from mild to life-threatening and every experience valid
-
Lend a hand
If they are struggling to use a computer or their mobile, but would like to access support via Hyperemesis Australia or other support services, like those listed in our Mental Health resource, then offer to help them to access these
Have a listen …
If you’re interested in learning more about pregnancy sickness and the experiences of sufferers then look no further than You, Me & HG.
The hosts of You, Me & HG, Caitlin and Yanika, are committed to reducing the loneliness and isolation HG sufferers live with by presenting a podcast full of survivor stories, plus tips and tricks for getting through the long days, paired with resources and education.
You, Me & HG, the official podcast of Hyperemesis Australia, focuses on the ‘what’ & the ‘how’ of pregnancy sickness, breaking down the full spectrum of sickness and how it affects its sufferers. Discussing the most up-to-date treatment recommendations, Caitlin and Yanika, offer their insight as two-time survivors, as well as their experiences as advocates for anyone touched by these relentless conditions.
The first and only podcast exclusively dedicated to pregnancy sickness and hyperemesis gravidarum, You, Me & HG dedicates full episodes to the stories of our beautiful community. Imagine your favourite birth and parenting podcasts but with a laser focus on the experiences, strength, resilience and love unique to HG survivors.
Intended to be a vital resource not just for sufferers and survivors, but for anyone wishing to better understand the reality of a sick pregnancy, You, Me & HG is a must-listen guide to living with HG.
Tips for visiting a HG or NVP suffer
-
DOs
Offer practical support, such as helping with household chores or running errands
Listen attentively and empathetically to their experiences without judgment
Bring small, thoughtful gifts like magazines, puzzles, or unscented lotions to help alleviate boredom during bed rest
Respect their boundaries and preferences regarding food smells and conversation topics
Provide emotional support by offering words of encouragement and reassurance
Offer to accompany them to medical appointments or provide childcare if needed
Educate yourself about HG to better understand their condition and needs
Follow their lead in terms of visiting frequency and duration, respecting their need for rest and privacy
Be patient and understanding, as they may need extra time and space to cope with their symptoms
Express your love and support, letting them know you're there for them no matter what
-
DON'Ts
Avoid bringing strong-smelling foods or beverages into their home without asking first
Refrain from making insensitive comments or offering unsolicited advice about their condition
Don't take it personally if they decline invitations or seem distant; remember that HG can be physically and emotionally draining
Avoid asking probing questions about their symptoms or treatment unless they initiate the conversation
Don't pressure them to eat or drink if they're feeling nauseous or unwell
Refrain from minimising their experiences or suggesting that they're exaggerating their symptoms
Avoid making comparisons to other pregnancies or suggesting remedies without consulting a healthcare professional
Refrain from expressing pity or treating them differently because of their condition; instead, treat them with dignity and respect
Don't overstay your welcome or expect them to entertain you; prioritise their comfort and well-being during your visit
Don’t forget to take care of yourself
While the most important part of having a loved one with HG is caring for them - you shouldn’t forget to look after yourself as well. You will feel tired, stressed and frustrated by the situation and all the added pressure you find yourself managing.
Find and accept as much help as you can with your older children, the running of your house and all the little jobs that are usually shared between you both.
Take some time out to do an activity that you enjoy. As long as you’re able to organise someone to be at home while you do so, there’s no reason to feel guilty about taking some time for yourself.
Don’t bottle up your stress or feelings about the situation. It sucks and you’re allowed to feel rubbish about it. Seek professional support or talk to a trusted friend or relative to get your feelings off your chest.
Remember to eat and sleep properly - you cannot be a good carer if you aren’t in good shape yourself.