My HG story: Yasmin
My expectation and reality of pregnancy were two very distinct things. I expected to be sick during my first trimester, but I never expected the gravity or duration of my sickness.
I thought morning sickness meant I would vomit once in the morning before going to work for the day. I could not have been more misguided about pregnancy sickness and how it would impact my ability to undertake daily tasks. I learned quickly and brutally that HG is not simply morning sickness.
I had always been conscientious, hard-working, and a high achiever. Prior to falling pregnant, I completed university and post-graduate study and worked full-time. I also travelled the world, built a house, and got married. But HG brought me to my knees at only 6 weeks of pregnancy.
I was so weak, I could barely stand, let alone walk. I could not shower myself, or wash my hair, as I did not have the strength to scrub my body or reach my hands up to my head. I was nauseous all the time, and I vomited frequently and violently during the day and at night. It was a very dark and isolating time. No one properly understood what I was experiencing, but how could they?
I worked from home, or rather from bed, on my laptop, stopping regularly to vomit. I vomited upwards of fifteen times during the workday - that is twice every hour!
Vomiting so regularly was exhausting, and it made me weaker each time. After vomiting, I felt some reprieve, but only for a short period. The constant nausea was crippling, and there was no escaping it. I felt queasy, like I needed to vomit, all day every day. The nausea loomed over me every waking moment of my pregnancy, which was 39 weeks and 2 days long.
I was medicated most of my pregnancy, but I was made to feel guilty about taking the medication. I was told I was harming my baby, and that I should toughen up and endure the symptoms. I was compared to other women who gracefully swanned through their pregnancies. Being medicated did not eliminate the nausea or vomiting, it simply lessened what I felt when it worked.
I felt so alone and completely misunderstood. I was suffering and not coping. At 17 weeks of pregnancy, I desperately searched the internet for help. I came across Hyperemesis Australia and requested support. I accessed the online resources, joined the Facebook group where I was able to connect with other pregnant women experiencing the same condition and was paired with a peer support survivor who contacted me regularly during my pregnancy and offered support. This was a turning point for me, as I was no longer suffering alone. I was one of many, and that gave me the strength to go on. I checked the posts on the Facebook page many times a day and was reassured that I would survive, just as those before me had.
HG was the most difficult experience I have had. It was all-consuming and debilitating. It impacted me both physically and psychologically. I never expected something as beautiful as pregnancy to be so destructive and traumatic. I was a sufferer, but now I am a survivor. I feel empowered and strong knowing I battled HG and won. I have a beautiful daughter, who is six months old, and who I am ever grateful for. I cherish every moment I have with her and feel that suffering and surviving HG has resulted in me becoming an engaged and present mother.
To those suffering, this too shall pass.